My Cycle of Anxiety....ugh!

My Cycle of anxiety looks a little like this.....

Step 1: I get anxious because my I had a stress-filled day and NOT took time out of my busy life to take care of myself.
Step 2: I come home from work and take my days stress's out on my husband and children. As a result of my impatience, I yell, say things I don't really mean, and 9 times out of 10, someone cry's. (most of the time, ME!)
Step 3: My family avoids me or walks on "egg shells" in my presence.
Step 4: I feel more anxious because my behavior has made my family avoid me.
Step 5: Repeat step 1-4 over, and over, and over again.

Does this sound familiar?

Let me explain this precarious cycle in "psycho-babble". (Think in a circle, going clockwise)

Step 1: We get anxious over kids, work, husbands, wives, traffic, our appearance, etc.....
Step 2: We try to control this anxiety by doing something different. i.e. Yelling, avoiding, drinking, smoking, cleaning, etc. These behaviors are often our "bad habits."
Step 3: Others try to "cope" with our bad habits. (see Step 2 above). i.e. They yell back, drink more, smoke more, or worst case sennerio they LEAVE us, etc....
Step 4: It's the snowball effect now. Since others are feeding off my bad habits, I then feel even MORE anxious and maybe scared, lonely, in need of therapy, etc.
Step 5: Repeat step 1-4 with any stressful stimulus.

It often takes many years and professional help to stop this endless, heart-breaking cycle; Duh! But, I promise you, that yes, I've heard worse and yes, I know bad habits are hard to break, but IT IS POSSIBLE. Should you feel like you need to talk to someone, please do so. There are a lot of VERY experienced behavioral therapists that do this on a daily basis. I encourage you to change your approach so others don't have to suffer any longer. I did!

My iphone is killing my family!

Now, I'll be perfectly honest, yes I own an iphone and use it quite often. It's one of my daily essential tools This little 3X2 inch rectangle makes my job as mother, wife, friend, and professional easier in A LOT of ways. However, when my son tells me to, "Stop playing with your phone, mommy and play with me," I know I have a problem. I guess you could say I need treatment for iphone-aholicism.

Needless, to say, this message that my son is giving me is to STOP and live in the moment rather than in cyber-space. If I don't get off my phone, I might miss out on something really important, like my child's growth. Those moments that we as parents take advantage of and have missed out on because we have been at work or on our iphone's NEEDS TO STOP.

Trust me, I have no stock in Apple or any other companies, and I love what they have created, but come on parents.....learn the lesson that I have learned and turn off your phone every once in awhile. LIVE IN THE MOMENT NOT IN CYBERSPACE!

(and if you see me on mine, remind me of this blog)